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1 Corinthians 7: On Marriage and Singleness

Paul gives wise counsel on marriage, sexual faithfulness, divorce, and singleness, urging undivided devotion to the Lord in whatever calling we are in.

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1 Corinthians 7 (WEB)

1 Now concerning the things about which you wrote to me: it is good for a man not to touch a woman.

2 But, because of sexual immoralities, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.

3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection owed her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

4 The wife doesn’t have authority over her own body, but the husband. Likewise also the husband doesn’t have authority over his own body, but the wife.

5 Don’t deprive one another, unless it is by consent for a season, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer, and may be together again, that Satan doesn’t tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

6 But this I say by way of concession, not of commandment.

7 Yet I wish that all men were like me. However each man has his own gift from God, one of this kind, and another of that kind.

8 But I say to the unmarried and to widows, it is good for them if they remain even as I am.

9 But if they don’t have self-control, let them marry. For it’s better to marry than to burn.

10 But to the married I command—not I, but the Lord—that the wife not leave her husband

11 (but if she departs, let her remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband not leave his wife.

12 But to the rest I—not the Lord—say, if any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she is content to live with him, let him not leave her.

13 The woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he is content to live with her, let her not leave her husband.

14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified in the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified in the husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.

15 Yet if the unbeliever departs, let there be separation. The brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us in peace.

16 For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

17 Only, as the Lord has distributed to each man, as God has called each, so let him walk. So I command in all the assemblies.

18 Was anyone called having been circumcised? Let him not become uncircumcised. Has anyone been called in uncircumcision? Let him not be circumcised.

19 Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing, but the keeping of the commandments of God.

20 Let each man stay in that calling in which he was called.

21 Were you called being a bondservant? Don’t let that bother you, but if you get an opportunity to become free, use it.

22 For he who was called in the Lord being a bondservant is the Lord’s free man. Likewise he who was called being free is Christ’s bondservant.

23 You were bought with a price. Don’t become bondservants of men.

24 Brothers, let each man, in whatever condition he was called, stay in that condition with God.

25 Now concerning virgins, I have no commandment from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who has obtained mercy from the Lord to be trustworthy.

26 I think that it is good therefore, because of the distress that is on us, that it is good for a man to be as he is.

27 Are you bound to a wife? Don’t seek to be freed. Are you free from a wife? Don’t seek a wife.

28 But if you marry, you have not sinned. If a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Yet such will have oppression in the flesh, and I want to spare you.

29 But I say this, brothers: the time is short, that from now on, both those who have wives may be as though they had none;

30 and those who weep, as though they didn’t weep; and those who rejoice, as though they didn’t rejoice; and those who buy, as though they didn’t possess;

31 and those who use the world, as not using it to the fullest. For the mode of this world passes away.

32 But I desire to have you to be free from cares. He who is unmarried is concerned for the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord;

33 but he who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife.

34 There is also a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband.

35 This I say for your own profit; not that I may ensnare you, but for that which is appropriate, and that you may attend to the Lord without distraction.

36 But if any man thinks that he is behaving inappropriately toward his virgin, if she is past the flower of her age, and if need so requires, let him do what he desires. He doesn’t sin. Let them marry.

37 But he who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but has power over his own heart, to keep his own virgin, does well.

38 So then both he who gives his own virgin in marriage does well, and he who doesn’t give her in marriage does better.

39 A wife is bound by law for as long as her husband lives; but if the husband is dead, she is free to be married to whomever she desires, only in the Lord.

40 But she is happier if she stays as she is, in my judgment, and I think that I also have God’s Spirit.

Summary

Responding to the Corinthians' questions, Paul addresses marriage and singleness with pastoral balance. Because of sexual temptation, husbands and wives should fulfill their marital duties to one another, each having authority over the other's body, and not depriving each other except by agreement for a season of prayer. Paul wishes all were single as he is, yet recognizes that each person has his own gift from God; the unmarried and widows do well to remain single, but if they lack self-control it is better to marry than to burn with passion. To the married he gives the Lord's command: a wife should not separate from her husband, and a husband should not divorce his wife. In mixed marriages, the believer should not leave an unbelieving spouse who is willing to stay, for the unbeliever and the children are set apart through the believing partner; yet if the unbeliever departs, the believer is not bound, for God has called us to peace. Paul's general principle is that each person should remain in the life situation in which God called them—circumcised or uncircumcised, slave or free—living for God there. Because the present age is passing and time is short, he counsels contentment and freedom from anxious cares, so believers can serve the Lord without distraction. Marrying is no sin, but the unmarried can give undivided attention to the things of the Lord, and a widow is free to remarry only in the Lord, though Paul thinks she is happier if she remains as she is.

Main Characters

  • Paul — The apostle who gives Spirit-guided counsel on marriage and singleness, balancing the Lord's commands with his own wise judgment.
  • Married believers — Husbands and wives called to mutual faithfulness, sexual honor, and lifelong commitment to one another.
  • The unmarried and widows — Those who may remain single for undistracted devotion to the Lord, or marry without sin if they lack self-control.
  • Believers in mixed marriages — Those married to unbelievers, urged to remain in peace for the sake of the spouse and children, yet not bound if the unbeliever leaves.

Key Verse

1 Corinthians 7:17 (WEB)

Only, as the Lord has distributed to each man, as God has called each, so let him walk.

Lessons Learned

  • Marriage involves mutual self-giving, with each spouse honoring the other's needs.
  • Both marriage and singleness are gifts; each person should live faithfully in their calling.
  • Believers should pursue peace and faithfulness even in difficult marriages.
  • Because time is short, our deepest aim is undistracted devotion to the Lord.
  • Marriage is mutual self-giving. Husband and wife each owe the other; neither has authority over their own body alone (1 Corinthians 7:3-4, WEB). Love serves rather than demands.
  • Each has his own gift. “Each man has his own gift from God, one of this kind, and another of that kind” (1 Corinthians 7:7, WEB). Singleness and marriage are both gifts of grace.
  • Live where God has called you. “Let each man stay in that calling in which he was called” (1 Corinthians 7:20, WEB). Faithfulness blooms in our present circumstances, not only in changed ones.
  • Aim at undistracted devotion. Paul wants believers to “attend to the Lord without distraction” (1 Corinthians 7:35, WEB). Every relationship is meant to serve, not crowd out, devotion to Christ.
  1. How does Paul's teaching on mutual marital duty reflect the value he places on both husband and wife?
  2. Why does Paul speak of both marriage and singleness as gifts rather than ranking one above the other?
  3. What hope and guidance does Paul give to a believer married to an unbeliever?
  4. What does Paul mean that the time is short, and how should that affect our priorities?
  5. Whether single or married, how can you pursue undistracted devotion to the Lord in your present season of life?
  1. Paul gives husband and wife equal authority and equal responsibility for one another's bodies (7:3-4), a striking dignity in his world. Marriage is portrayed as mutual self-giving in love, not the dominance of one over the other.
  2. Both states are gifts suited to different callings (7:7). Singleness frees a person for undistracted service, while marriage is a good and honorable calling; the point is to live faithfully and contentedly wherever God has placed us.
  3. The believer should remain with a willing unbeliever, for the spouse and children are set apart through them, and may be won (7:13-16). Yet if the unbeliever insists on leaving, the believer is not enslaved, for God calls us to peace.
  4. The present form of this world is passing away (7:31), so earthly relationships and possessions, while good, are not ultimate. This frees believers from anxious clinging and reorders life around what lasts—the Lord and his kingdom.
  5. This is a personal-application question. Invite members, whatever their situation, to consider one way their schedule, relationships, or worries either help or hinder devotion to Christ. As leader, affirm both singleness and marriage as honorable callings before God.

Scripture quotations are from the World English Bible (WEB), the King James Version (KJV), and the American Standard Version (ASV), all of which are in the public domain.